Teenaged Daughters & Moms

My girls and I attended our first of four Bible studies for moms & teenage daughters. Our pastor's wife is leading it and I'd like to share a few thoughts we discussed.

That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth;
That our daughters may be as pillars, sculptured in palace style
Psalm 144:12 NKJV

The King James translates it as such:
That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth;
that our daughters may be as corner stones, polished after the similitude of a palace:

Wow! Our daughters are to be cornerstones, the foundational stone of the building. Think about that...cornerstones are suppose to bear the weight of the building so our daughters should be growing up to bear a great weight. Not only is she to bear much weight, she is a cornerstone in a palace where kings & queens reside. She is polished for much glory. What a beautiful picture for us to consider as we raise our daughters. Sometimes I think moms consider this picture, but don't talk to their daughters about where they should be headed - the goal of glory for a future husband, the ability to bear much through both good & bad times, and a desire to be part of a beautiful home, a palace of our own.

As you think about raising a "polished cornerstone", consider the following character qualities.

• Noble - In I Timothy 5 we read that widows who are worthy of support are to be of a very high reputation and character. In verse 10 we see that she is to be "well reported of good works: if she has brought up children, if she has lodged strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has relieved the afflicted, if she has diligently followed every good work." In other words she is a very active woman before her husband dies. Good works are character of her life throughout. Think about this one for a moment - she has raised children and been quite the hostesss. Showing hospitality is second nature to her. These days we undervalue the power of gracious hospitality to others. She ministers to those around her in a way that is truly helpful to others. As she lived her life she pursued good works. What a high calling for our daughters (& ourselves).
• Gracious - A gracious woman retains honor (Proverbs 11:6). Our daughters should be gracious to those around them. Kindness should be evident both in the way a mom treats her daughter and the way a daughter treats her mom. In addition to be kind, a gracious woman has an elegance about her. Elegance is evident in the way she takes care of her home so we should be training our daughters in the ways of having an elegant home and the ability to care for it well. Now, this does not mean you have to spend lots of money to have an elegant home; elegance comes from the inside and we should teach our daughters how to be elegant. Sometimes I think we can spend time teaching our daughters domestic skills, but not in an elegant way. When the woman of a home is gracious, kind and elegant, she makes those who enter her home comfortable while they are there. Are you teaching your daughters how to make others feel comfortable as you teach her those domestic skills?
• Refinement - Modesty should be an authority in our lives and our daughters' lives. We should embrace feminity, even though the world does not truly embrace the idea of being feminine. Biblical feminity is at war with the world. Our daughters should be polished in manners, know what is appropriate in situations and have a stately air about them (not a snobby air). In other words, we should teach our daughters that it is not good to be an airhead, ditzy or Barbie-like. Those are qualities the world embraces, but not qualities the Christian should embrace.
• Rejects Idleness - Our daughters should be serious about their lives and not a busy body in other people's lives.
• Good Spiritual Discipline - Are you and your daughter in the Word on a daily basis? It is only through God's Word that we will grow to Christian maturity and transform the world around us.

Moms, encourage your daughters as you train them. Don't overload them emotionally, emotionally or domestically. You know, they need to raise a family - but not yours.

Daughters, receive teaching humbly from your mom. Watch your moms and embrace your parents' standards. If you don't understand your parents' standards, then ask them.

Much of this entry came from Nancy Wilson at her Bible study for moms & teen daughters. Books by Nancy include Fruit of Her Hands, Praise Her in the Gates, and Our Mother Tongue


Kerry